So much...so so so so much...Man here to begin....

It started Wed. I got the call that my bestfriend from highschool's brother passed away...Thur., I went to work...Fri...I took...and have been off every since. A mixture of emotional tiredness and just physically tired has fueled my need to be off for the rest of the week...This is life...Sun./Mon. where both great days filled with empowerment and well wishes...nothing but sisterly love and motivation...Career conference gave me the kick in the pants I need to really work my business (Mary Kay). I thogt i had alot of obstacles in my way..but as my granny said, "there are people in this world more worse off than yew!" After hearing several 'Istories," I decided to build and work on mines...

You ever have a crush? A long standing crush you never did anything about? Just lusted, giggled and imagined from afar...what life coud be like with this person...well folks! That shit is the truth...some crushes need to stay that...crushes from a far...turns out my crush (who internalizes everything) wasn't as great as i built him up to be over the years..and yes i bilt him up...and he was so beautifully human in every aspect..there's a part of me that wants to give people a chance and not be so skeptical but ya know when u have those inclinations sometimes you gotta take heed...Things were great..fine and dandy..but then ya know when i decided to call or text..my calls and texts went unanswered for days...and ya know i realize sometimes that networks trip...but it wasnt till i hung out with him that i realized..."he's just not that into you." And more importantly when a family member of theirs casually let me know he was still diddling his ex...eh i was over it and him...I wont change the way i act but no more flirting and lusty thoughts...the thing was i liked him and thought the thing was mutual..hell he may like me..but not as much hahahaha...*shrugs* At any rate it was a let down and i was so disappointed...u know how u really like someone and have all the intentions in the world that u want it to work..but to no avail...nothing..eh I don't know what i'mma do when he tries to see or hang out with me..i guess i should be honest but what for ya know? For once i'd like some mutual reciprocity...