I remember back in like 95...I was dating a dude who just so happened to be a hustler. When he met me i had long individual braids in my hair, but i also had on a cap.. I kept the braids in for about 3 months while at school. So me and him kept in touch while i went back to school.. That summer I stayed with my then best friend Z. I hadn't did anything with my hair all summer. I came back to bmore and was like hook it up! Deana looked at me like i had lost my mind. She said my only course of action was to let it rock or untangle it. At the time i had hair past my shoulders. I had been swimming everyday..was just washing it and nothing much else...It was brittle..and damaged...Deana also offered me another course of action. I could cut it all off and start all over. I chose to go natural. At first it was rough. I'll never forget it because i was turning 21 in a few days and wanted my face front license to look cute. So I takes my photo, later i get a call from dude saying he wanted to see me..Now every time he said he wanted to see me..it would always be like 12am or later. I lived with my granny at the time..she lived in a senior citizen building..the building was guarded 24/7 but at night..i had to call granny to come down and pick me up. Even tho she said she didn't mind me hanging out past midnight i felt bad...because she'd take these cat naps and i hated waking her from her naps. So i came downstairs to meet dude so we could go to the then 24/7 IHOP...i get in the car he just has this look on his face..he was like what happened!?? I'd never seen someone react so strongly to hair..I was like oh my hair was damaged i had to cut it off. By the time he saw me, my hair was in a cute curly fro...sorta like i wore it 2 years ago this time..He asked me did i want a hat...i declined..we went into the IHOP..he kept looking around..we sat down i asked him what was wrong. "I just don't want folks thinking I'm dating a dude." I laughed and said that's silly..i don't even look like a dude..Now back in 95 i was rail thin..but i had my 36b's so no one was mistaking me for a dude. Over breakfast he offered to get my hair braided..which at the time was upwards of 300...i declined and said if u wanna pay for something pay for my books this semester..but he wasn't hearing it. All night he kept looking at me...as if he was thinking to himself can i do this..Needless to say by the time i got back to grannies...we had a long talk about hair and how people responded when she cut out her "process". She said she'd never encountered so much hate being connected with going natural. Thereafter i stopped calling dude for a few reasons..he still called me. Which was funny because he had such a strong reaction to me going natural. It wasn't a fashion statement rather a personal choice since i had let my hair go. It wouldn't be the first time a dude tried to change me or change my mind about a process or phase i was going thru. That's hilarious...like do some people think they carry that much influence that they can change your whole perception?

In other news today me and another friend are staging and intervention for 2 of our other friends who had a falling out over a dude. The crazy thing is neither is mad at the dude or holding him accountable for playing them both.. *sigh* We want them to talk and realize how dumb ass it is to spoil something over a dude who ain't worth it...pray for me..pray for us.